Conversation with my brother on bbm#2

This conversation happened while we sat across from one another on a commuter train.

My brother sends a picture of my nephew Boobers.

Me: Cutest baby in the history of all babies born, ever, in the entire universe.
Bro: HA! Get him some press so I don't have to work for a living.
Me: Maybe I'll write an ode to Boobers. BTW, my ankle still looks like a cankle(I sprained my ankle almost a year ago and my right foot looks like it belongs to a nonna)
Bro: You need to let me operate!
Me: No way in hell! What treatment would you provide?
Bro: I would google it and go from there.
Me: Are you nuts? You want me to entrust my health care to a pseudo doctor who is going to "google" my treatment? No thanks broke foot( my brother has a healing achilles).
Bro: "Pseudo" doctors are the new wave in health care, in the absence of real doctors. My foot is healing quite nicely with adamantium steel  implants à la Wolverine.
Me:You done lost your mind. Judging by the way you took care of me as a child, I'll pass on the treatment.
Bro: I have more presence of mind than ever. I don't know what childhood you speak of. I gave you quality sibling stewardship.
Me: WHAT? Stewardship? Who uses that word?
Bro: People with intellectual capital use words like "stewardship".
Me: Wow!How incredibly pretentious.