In varying degrees, I have been slightly(or grossly) pudgy, overweight, Rubenesque throughout my life. The more I advance in years, the more arduous the task of losing that weight becomes. I have never felt the pressure to fit into a certain beauty ideal. People often tell me I have a pretty face when I want them to say " you look hungry" or " maybe you should eat a sandwich". I KID! I want to lose weight because I want to be healthy (as cliche as that sounds).
As a child my brother was a picky eater, while I ate everything put in front of me. I may not have enjoyed it all, but I was an obedient and docile child. If you offered me chocolate covered snails I probably would have eaten it. In adulthood, I try anything once(food wise)- I think that is the one area of my life where fear isn't at the forefront.
A few years ago, I went to visit my friend "Sabine" in Greece for the first time. The heat was relentless, it seemed like everything was uphill and like there were a million and one stairs to climb. Once in a while she would catch me taking a break and I would say"Oh, I am just taking a picture"or "just taking in the sunset" when I was gasping for some fucking air! She knew what was up and called me on it. I won't make excuses or try to rationalize why I am overweight when I ate a bag of Cadbury mini-eggs last night. I'm just going to try my best. I don't want to be a fatty no more!
Love.. You have just done what many people in this world cannot.. Admitting you have a problem and confronting it head on. I was that round kid too and I think I remember the exact moment when I started to eat more.. I remember a conversation with my Grandaunt and her saying to me "Yes in the winter time you must eat more like the bears do.." That's when me at 6 years old took advice from a woman that was no size 8... Hence the eating began.. Rhodesia, you can do it if you put your mind to it! I know you can.. With so many things you have passion for in your life you need to take that same strength and put it towards this FATTYDOM!
ReplyDeleteYou know whats funny, I just ate a huge bag of Cadbury Eggs to myself last night too. Is it me or do they taste better this year? On the bag it said "Now available all year round!" And I almost went into cardiac arrest!! I was so happy!
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